The goal of this law of attraction article is very simple: how to use the things you hate to help you get what you want. Briefly, we need to contextualize this so we’re on the same page, but we’ll end with a suggestion on how to use the things you don’t want to help bring you the things you do want. And this is probably the most useful tool a person studying the law of attraction can have: an instant and powerful reframe on horrible things.
In the law of attraction, knowing what you want and what you don’t want is extremely important. They are the basis for getting what you want. And it’s easy to see if you think about it for a minute: If you don’t know what you want, then you can never know if you have it or not because you’ve never been looking for anything, you’ve just been looking. This aimless stare is often excruciatingly painful, and even when it’s not painful, it’s rarely helpful.
Very often, I used to get angry because I “didn’t get what I wanted”… until I really thought about it and realized that I didn’t just want that thing: I had also thought of all the possible ways it could go wrong and what could suck about it. He had thought and thought and thought about how he would fail. So much so that if I really achieved my goals, I wasn’t sure what to do. This happened to me when I was a door-to-door salesman: I was so rejected that when people wanted to buy, I was surprised, and the first thing I wanted to say was: “Really? Really, why?”
And I would think this because I never focused on the sale. I always focused on the negative things, like was I messing up or wondering if they were still paying attention or what would I tell my bosses about how they just couldn’t be sold.
I hope you get the idea: I concentrated on the worst. And so my days were constantly filled with nightmares because not only was I drawing them to me in the world, but I was bombarding my mind and emotions with terrible feelings about things that hadn’t happened yet, and might not happen!
So how did I use this?
I focused on all the things I didn’t want and turned them into positives. For example, one thought I’ve often had is, “I don’t want people to ignore me.” This is an incredibly negative belief because it focuses on people ignoring me and my desire that people not ignore me. I want to be heard! Rather, a better thought, a wishful thinking that I can have is “I want to captivate people with my words.” And this is a very powerful wish, a wish that permeates all of my communication, including this article.
The belief “I hate stupid people” (something I hate to hear) could be transformed into “I want to captivate everyone around me to constantly raise their intelligence level” if you are an idealist like me. Or, of course, “I want to interact only with people of high intellect for periods longer than seven minutes.” Both are things you want, not things you want to reject.
To do this for yourself, simply think about what you don’t want. Then think of its opposite. This is very often something you want. If not, think of something similar until something clicks. You can use this for your worst nightmare as promised above. For example, if you are very afraid of others physically hurting you, you want safety and people to respect each other. Or if you’re afraid of drowning, maybe you could learn to swim properly. If you’re scared of clowns, you might want to find anything funny, regardless of how it made you feel. There really is no right or wrong, it just captures a more positive thought than the last.
A great secret of the law of attraction is that feeling bad about things and rejecting them is only good if you use it to push things out of your experience. It has no other purpose: it tells you what you don’t want. However, insisting on what you don’t want will draw it to you (if only in your head…).
